Togepi Writes (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
togepi_writes) wrote2020-06-03 04:23 pm
togepi_writes) wrote2020-06-03 04:23 pm
Entry tags:
(Canon) Changes
- Changes -
Characters: Juudai Yuuki, Yubel
Synopsis: After talking with Juudai about her frustrations, Yubel tries a new direction in her life.
It was the end of the day, but instead of heading to his D-Wheel parked up in SAI's car park, Juudai began heading towards the large spirit house situated beside the main building.
Yubel had appeared earlier in the day and told him to meet her there when he was finished with work as she needed to speak to him about something, before making herself scarce the rest of the day.
He had a feeling he knew what this was about, he'd had the feeling for a while, but he didn't want to force anything out of her, so had waited until she chose to bring it up to him.
Walking into the Spirit House, Juudai instantly spotted Yubel sat by the pond being bothered by the smaller spirits that lived there, curious about her presence there. She didn't at all look happy about their curiosity.
"Need a little help?" he asked as he approached her. Yubel looked up at Juudai, then shot a sneer at the smaller spirits.
"I did not think these little... things would be such a bother."
Juudai let out a little laugh as Winged Kuriboh appeared beside him.
"Aibou, play with the little spirits for a bit."
Winged Kuriboh gave a trill and happily flew over to the little spirits, who instantly found its presence to be much more fun. Winged Kuriboh quickly flew off and the smaller spirits followed.
Juudai watched them leave before sitting down beside Yubel.
"So, you said you wanted to talk about something?"
"Yes. I--"
Yubel broke off her sentence almost instantly. She wasn't sure how to even begin with all of this.
So Juudai decided to help her along a bit.
"It's about the decision Asuka and I made, isn't it? About starting a family."
Yubel looked up at him in surprise.
"How did you---?"
"Come on, Yubel! We've been together long enough that I can tell when something is bothering you."
"Of course." She paused before continuing. "It is about that, but it also brought up some other... things, that I have been feeling for a while and I felt I needed to bring these up with you. As ... difficult as it is for me to do so.
I've just been feeling... frustrated! And angry! And..." she gave out a defeated sigh. "...and lost. I do not know where I stand currently in your life and I was... afraid... that I'd be pushed out of it as you concentrated more on your family. That I would have much less contact with you and... much less purpose."
But, than I talked to Asuka and... it went well. Better than I think either of us really expected. The conversation was very... liberating for us. We got out our grievances with each other and found that... maybe she and I, in some ways, aren't so different.
She told me that she did not have an issue with myself being in your lives, as long as I respected her importance to you.
We reached the conclusion that we should find a middle ground, by calling a truce.
But then she brought up something else... about me stagnating in my current role as your protector, because that's all I saw myself as. I had talked to that Samasu that works for you prior to this as well and they also said something similar.
Asuka told me that she felt I needed to build up a 'sense of self'. To be... more... than what I currently am.
But I feel conflicted. I gave away my humanity and any real 'sense of self' when I swore to protect the Supreme King and I feel guilt for... wishing to experience more than just that. Guilt because I want to... grow and experience life alongside you.
I don't regret that choice I made, but I... tch...!"
Yubel placed a hand over her face in frustration. She hated all these mixed feelings she was getting from all this.
Noting her frustration, Juudai reached out and gently took hold of her other hand, which made her look over in surprise, only to meet Juudai's warm smile looking back at her.
"I'm really glad you're talking to me about all this, Yubel, and that you're opening up and talking to others."
Yubel seemed taken back by this at first, until she realised that she was and snatched her hand away, defensively crossing them over her chest.
"You're making this sound like a therapy session." she huffed. Juudai just let out a small laugh in response.
"Nothing wrong with that. Seems like you have a lot to talk about and, well, if there's one thing I've learned through all these years it's that talking kinda, y'know.... helps! Especially when you're feeling frustrated about something. Keeping things to myself and trying to handle things myself got me into some pretty dark places at times in the past."
Yubel gave out a sigh. She knew what times Juudai was referring too. The second part of his last year at the Academy, just after they had merged through Super Fusion, and even the time after graduation, he'd gone through a lot of stress over things that had happened during that time. He was seen as the 'hero' who everyone turned to, but he also was going through his own battle with his Supreme King abilities and his fears over them.
He at times secluded himself from his friends, feared if he opened up to them he'd put them in danger, but all it did was drag him further into the darkness of fear and pain... and even she felt unable to really help him during that time.
By the time he graduated, he was pretty burnt out.
But that's where Asuka came in. Maybe Asuka worried that she was too 'normal' to have a right to be in Juudai's life, but maybe she didn't realise just how much Juudai had needed 'normal' during that time. It was why Yubel felt she needed to accept Juudai's relationship with her. She could give him 'normal'.
A normal life. A normal relationship.
She could ground him when he needed it. Talk to him when he needed it. Give him a break from the stress of the rest of his life. All the things Yubel felt she couldn't do.
Asuka was one of the things that gradually helped him out of the dark hole.
"Yubel...?"
Yubel snapped out of her thoughts and looked back over at Juudai, who was glancing at her with concern. "Do you still want to talk about things?"
Taking a deep breath, Yubel gave him a small nod. "Yes."
"Alright." Juudai smiled and gave a nod back. "So, you've been worried about the decision Asuka and I made about having a child and what it means for your placement in my life, but it's kind of opened up a can of worms about how you've been feeling in general... am I right?"
"Yes. I just... don't know what it means for me. My purpose, the one I was MADE for is important, but... what am I the rest of the time? What will I do when you are concentrating more on your family? I don't even fully understand 'family'!"
Juudai thought for a moment, thinking over everything that she had said to him, before he began his reply.
"I can understand what you're feeling, so we need to find a way for you to be a bit more involved, or at least a way we can work this out in a way where we both are happy.
In the end, I'm going to live for a long time, a very long time, so I want to experience as much as I can of life. I never really had the best experience of family, so becoming a father is one of the many things I'd like to do and we feel like now is the right time for it."
"Asuka is right that she and I have much more limited time together than we do, so it's understandable that she wants you to respect that, but that doesn't mean the time I spend with you isn't as important."
With that, Juudai leaned further towards Yubel, placing his hands affectionately on hers.
"Yubel. You're MORE to me than just being my shield." He gave her a warm smile. "You ARE family to me. And if family is something you wish to understand, if it's something you want to experience more of, then I'm happy to share that with you."
Yubel glanced down at Juudai's hands holding her own, but she seemed conflicted.
"But I do not exactly fit in your 'family' and even if I were to reach out to try and...talk, to more people, my appearance would frighten them."
"Your appearance shouldn't really matter but..." Juudai trailed off into thought. To him, it didn't matter what Yubel looked like, but he could understand that most other people would find her appearance frightening and may not give her a chance.
A thought then suddenly came to him.
"Yubel. Have you ever thought about taking on a human disguise? You know, like some of the spirits who choose to live in the city do? That'd be something you'd be able to do, right?"
Yubel seemed surprised at his suggestion. It hadn't been anything she'd really considered doing before.
"Well, yes. If those signer dragons can do that, then I can, but..." she sighed. "I would not be as strong in that form as I am now."
"But you'd be able to change back when needed, right?"
Yubel hesitated. "Well... I suppose I would be able to..."
Juudai could sense her hesitation. After all, her current form was created solely to protect the Supreme King and that's all she had known, but times change, situations change and it was obvious that she needed something different.
"I know it's a lot to consider and if you aren't comfortable, then it's fine, but this maybe a way for you to explore yourself more and learn more about others.
Those who made you who you are... they aren't around anymore. It's just us and I want to make sure that you're happy with yourself and who you are.
We will always be by each others side and we'll always be connected, but if there are things you want to explore for yourself, then I'm happy to give you all the support you need for it.
Because we're family."
There were something about those words Juudai said that resonated with Yubel. There was a lot happening, a lot of things she was feeling, but ... Juudai believed in her and wanted this for her and that was enough to at least try.
She gave him a slow nod, to show she was willing to give this a go, before closing her eyes. In response, Juudai held her hands more firmly for reassurance as duel energy began circling around Yubel...
When Yubel opened her eyes again, she saw Juudai looking back at her with a warm smile.
Glancing over towards the pond, Yubel looked down at her reflection in it in awe and shock.
It had worked. The face looking back at her was human-looking.
Getting to her feet, she quickly felt unbalanced and stumbled backwards, but Juudai quickly reached out to steady her.
"I am not used to being without wings." She stated, before looking over at her hands. "My whole body feels... lighter... in this form."
Yubel frowned a little as she steadied herself on her feet. Juudai could tell that she was still feeling undecided with the idea of the new form. After all, it was difficult to make such a huge change after becoming so set in just being one thing forever.
"We'll just give this a try and see how it goes." he said reassuringly. "If you find it's not the answer you were looking for, you can simply change back."
"But... what if something goes wrong? What if I can't change back when you need me to? What if I can't protect you? What if--?"
Juudai shook his head slowly.
"We'll take each day as it comes. If something happens, we'll deal with it then.
Right now, it's about what you want and it's about us being a family. Me, you and Asuka."
Feeling a little choked up, with tears in her eyes, she quickly pulled Juudai into a hug.
Smiling, Juudai simply returned the hug with her in silence.
This was a huge chance for the both of them and for the dynamic they had in each others lives. It was going to take a lot of getting used to and a lot of adjustment, but they both hoped that this would help them grow and experience new things, both together and separately.
Characters: Juudai Yuuki, Yubel
Synopsis: After talking with Juudai about her frustrations, Yubel tries a new direction in her life.
It was the end of the day, but instead of heading to his D-Wheel parked up in SAI's car park, Juudai began heading towards the large spirit house situated beside the main building.
Yubel had appeared earlier in the day and told him to meet her there when he was finished with work as she needed to speak to him about something, before making herself scarce the rest of the day.
He had a feeling he knew what this was about, he'd had the feeling for a while, but he didn't want to force anything out of her, so had waited until she chose to bring it up to him.
Walking into the Spirit House, Juudai instantly spotted Yubel sat by the pond being bothered by the smaller spirits that lived there, curious about her presence there. She didn't at all look happy about their curiosity.
"Need a little help?" he asked as he approached her. Yubel looked up at Juudai, then shot a sneer at the smaller spirits.
"I did not think these little... things would be such a bother."
Juudai let out a little laugh as Winged Kuriboh appeared beside him.
"Aibou, play with the little spirits for a bit."
Winged Kuriboh gave a trill and happily flew over to the little spirits, who instantly found its presence to be much more fun. Winged Kuriboh quickly flew off and the smaller spirits followed.
Juudai watched them leave before sitting down beside Yubel.
"So, you said you wanted to talk about something?"
"Yes. I--"
Yubel broke off her sentence almost instantly. She wasn't sure how to even begin with all of this.
So Juudai decided to help her along a bit.
"It's about the decision Asuka and I made, isn't it? About starting a family."
Yubel looked up at him in surprise.
"How did you---?"
"Come on, Yubel! We've been together long enough that I can tell when something is bothering you."
"Of course." She paused before continuing. "It is about that, but it also brought up some other... things, that I have been feeling for a while and I felt I needed to bring these up with you. As ... difficult as it is for me to do so.
I've just been feeling... frustrated! And angry! And..." she gave out a defeated sigh. "...and lost. I do not know where I stand currently in your life and I was... afraid... that I'd be pushed out of it as you concentrated more on your family. That I would have much less contact with you and... much less purpose."
But, than I talked to Asuka and... it went well. Better than I think either of us really expected. The conversation was very... liberating for us. We got out our grievances with each other and found that... maybe she and I, in some ways, aren't so different.
She told me that she did not have an issue with myself being in your lives, as long as I respected her importance to you.
We reached the conclusion that we should find a middle ground, by calling a truce.
But then she brought up something else... about me stagnating in my current role as your protector, because that's all I saw myself as. I had talked to that Samasu that works for you prior to this as well and they also said something similar.
Asuka told me that she felt I needed to build up a 'sense of self'. To be... more... than what I currently am.
But I feel conflicted. I gave away my humanity and any real 'sense of self' when I swore to protect the Supreme King and I feel guilt for... wishing to experience more than just that. Guilt because I want to... grow and experience life alongside you.
I don't regret that choice I made, but I... tch...!"
Yubel placed a hand over her face in frustration. She hated all these mixed feelings she was getting from all this.
Noting her frustration, Juudai reached out and gently took hold of her other hand, which made her look over in surprise, only to meet Juudai's warm smile looking back at her.
"I'm really glad you're talking to me about all this, Yubel, and that you're opening up and talking to others."
Yubel seemed taken back by this at first, until she realised that she was and snatched her hand away, defensively crossing them over her chest.
"You're making this sound like a therapy session." she huffed. Juudai just let out a small laugh in response.
"Nothing wrong with that. Seems like you have a lot to talk about and, well, if there's one thing I've learned through all these years it's that talking kinda, y'know.... helps! Especially when you're feeling frustrated about something. Keeping things to myself and trying to handle things myself got me into some pretty dark places at times in the past."
Yubel gave out a sigh. She knew what times Juudai was referring too. The second part of his last year at the Academy, just after they had merged through Super Fusion, and even the time after graduation, he'd gone through a lot of stress over things that had happened during that time. He was seen as the 'hero' who everyone turned to, but he also was going through his own battle with his Supreme King abilities and his fears over them.
He at times secluded himself from his friends, feared if he opened up to them he'd put them in danger, but all it did was drag him further into the darkness of fear and pain... and even she felt unable to really help him during that time.
By the time he graduated, he was pretty burnt out.
But that's where Asuka came in. Maybe Asuka worried that she was too 'normal' to have a right to be in Juudai's life, but maybe she didn't realise just how much Juudai had needed 'normal' during that time. It was why Yubel felt she needed to accept Juudai's relationship with her. She could give him 'normal'.
A normal life. A normal relationship.
She could ground him when he needed it. Talk to him when he needed it. Give him a break from the stress of the rest of his life. All the things Yubel felt she couldn't do.
Asuka was one of the things that gradually helped him out of the dark hole.
"Yubel...?"
Yubel snapped out of her thoughts and looked back over at Juudai, who was glancing at her with concern. "Do you still want to talk about things?"
Taking a deep breath, Yubel gave him a small nod. "Yes."
"Alright." Juudai smiled and gave a nod back. "So, you've been worried about the decision Asuka and I made about having a child and what it means for your placement in my life, but it's kind of opened up a can of worms about how you've been feeling in general... am I right?"
"Yes. I just... don't know what it means for me. My purpose, the one I was MADE for is important, but... what am I the rest of the time? What will I do when you are concentrating more on your family? I don't even fully understand 'family'!"
Juudai thought for a moment, thinking over everything that she had said to him, before he began his reply.
"I can understand what you're feeling, so we need to find a way for you to be a bit more involved, or at least a way we can work this out in a way where we both are happy.
In the end, I'm going to live for a long time, a very long time, so I want to experience as much as I can of life. I never really had the best experience of family, so becoming a father is one of the many things I'd like to do and we feel like now is the right time for it."
"Asuka is right that she and I have much more limited time together than we do, so it's understandable that she wants you to respect that, but that doesn't mean the time I spend with you isn't as important."
With that, Juudai leaned further towards Yubel, placing his hands affectionately on hers.
"Yubel. You're MORE to me than just being my shield." He gave her a warm smile. "You ARE family to me. And if family is something you wish to understand, if it's something you want to experience more of, then I'm happy to share that with you."
Yubel glanced down at Juudai's hands holding her own, but she seemed conflicted.
"But I do not exactly fit in your 'family' and even if I were to reach out to try and...talk, to more people, my appearance would frighten them."
"Your appearance shouldn't really matter but..." Juudai trailed off into thought. To him, it didn't matter what Yubel looked like, but he could understand that most other people would find her appearance frightening and may not give her a chance.
A thought then suddenly came to him.
"Yubel. Have you ever thought about taking on a human disguise? You know, like some of the spirits who choose to live in the city do? That'd be something you'd be able to do, right?"
Yubel seemed surprised at his suggestion. It hadn't been anything she'd really considered doing before.
"Well, yes. If those signer dragons can do that, then I can, but..." she sighed. "I would not be as strong in that form as I am now."
"But you'd be able to change back when needed, right?"
Yubel hesitated. "Well... I suppose I would be able to..."
Juudai could sense her hesitation. After all, her current form was created solely to protect the Supreme King and that's all she had known, but times change, situations change and it was obvious that she needed something different.
"I know it's a lot to consider and if you aren't comfortable, then it's fine, but this maybe a way for you to explore yourself more and learn more about others.
Those who made you who you are... they aren't around anymore. It's just us and I want to make sure that you're happy with yourself and who you are.
We will always be by each others side and we'll always be connected, but if there are things you want to explore for yourself, then I'm happy to give you all the support you need for it.
Because we're family."
There were something about those words Juudai said that resonated with Yubel. There was a lot happening, a lot of things she was feeling, but ... Juudai believed in her and wanted this for her and that was enough to at least try.
She gave him a slow nod, to show she was willing to give this a go, before closing her eyes. In response, Juudai held her hands more firmly for reassurance as duel energy began circling around Yubel...
When Yubel opened her eyes again, she saw Juudai looking back at her with a warm smile.
Glancing over towards the pond, Yubel looked down at her reflection in it in awe and shock.
It had worked. The face looking back at her was human-looking.
Getting to her feet, she quickly felt unbalanced and stumbled backwards, but Juudai quickly reached out to steady her.
"I am not used to being without wings." She stated, before looking over at her hands. "My whole body feels... lighter... in this form."
Yubel frowned a little as she steadied herself on her feet. Juudai could tell that she was still feeling undecided with the idea of the new form. After all, it was difficult to make such a huge change after becoming so set in just being one thing forever.
"We'll just give this a try and see how it goes." he said reassuringly. "If you find it's not the answer you were looking for, you can simply change back."
"But... what if something goes wrong? What if I can't change back when you need me to? What if I can't protect you? What if--?"
Juudai shook his head slowly.
"We'll take each day as it comes. If something happens, we'll deal with it then.
Right now, it's about what you want and it's about us being a family. Me, you and Asuka."
Feeling a little choked up, with tears in her eyes, she quickly pulled Juudai into a hug.
Smiling, Juudai simply returned the hug with her in silence.
This was a huge chance for the both of them and for the dynamic they had in each others lives. It was going to take a lot of getting used to and a lot of adjustment, but they both hoped that this would help them grow and experience new things, both together and separately.